As yogis, most of us have times when we eat, sleep and breathe yoga. We crave it when we're not doing it. We fill our time off the mat reading articles about yoga and looking at photos taken of amazing poses we hope we can one day master. We practice everyday, perhaps several times a day, and if we have to miss a day for what ever reason, we feel like we missed something gravely important that day.
But then there are times when you fall into a rut. You just don't seem to be getting the same benefits out of your practice as you were last month. You spend class frustrated with one thing or another. "This class is too hot." "I don't like this playlist." "Why in God's name is she holding warrior III for so long!" We leave class feeling less than blissful, and therefore find it increasingly harder to return to our mats day after day.
We may be frustrated with one thing in our lives or another, and projecting those frustrations onto the mat. Just like in a relationship, we often take out our frustrations on our partner. What is truly bothering us may have nothing to do with them at all, but you are comfortable with them, and you can take out your anger on them and know that they will put up with it and be there for you after it all has passed.
I have discovered a similar relationship with my practice. When something in my life isn't going my way, I often find that these are the times that I struggle to find peace in my practice. I find it hard to push my thoughts out of my head, and find it even harder to be alone with them. And I blame this restlessness on yoga itself. I blame the teacher, the temperature, the music, the farting man next to me. I do it because I know that once what ever is bothering me in my life has passed, my practice will always be there for me. Patiently waiting for me to come back to it.
Slowly, I am learning how to deal with what ever is bothering me directly, but for now, at the stage I am at in my life, it is so reassuring to know that my mat always has my back. No matter how long I go without, or how many negative thoughts I project onto my practice, it will always be there for me. People will come and go in my life, but my practice will always be there. That's a pretty awesome feeling.