Every once and a while, I get this feeling of utter calmness. I feel in that particular moment, I am exactly where I'm meant to be. It feels so peaceful, I'm almost afraid to move, lest I break the spell.
I have been getting that feeling more and more lately. As I lay on a rooftop in Spain, listening to music, in the company of an American guy and a Dutch girl. No one talking. All of us just sharing the space. Each of us doing our own thing, but together. Each of us with our own past. Each of us with our own story that lead us here, to this place. Together.
I spent a good deal of energy in the last three weeks trying to focus on the present. We would meditate for half an hour every morning, and it never came easily to me. I had so much trouble trying not to think about the past, or imagine the future. But then all of a sudden, when I'm not even trying, I find these moments of such calm. I don't have to try to focus on the present, it just happens. I don't care about the past. It doesn't matter what happens in the future. The present just envelopes me. Like the warmth of the sun on your skin, or a cozy blanket on a cold day.
I think that is what is so addictive about travel. At times, you feel the most intense loneliness. It can be a weird feeling, being so far from anyone who knows your past, or who has known you for longer than a few days. But then, all of a sudden, without even realizing it was happening, you are laying on a rooftop in Spain, with two people who don't know your past, who have only known you for a few days, and you feel so incredibly at home. There is no where on earth you would rather be, and no one on earth you would rather be sharing space with. And in that present moment, nothing else matters.
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